Well, I did it.
I've been battling with myself about this for a long time and I knew the time was coming. I began the adventures of getting my first wheel chair. It's not something I need right now and not certainly something I'll need all the time, but as the weather starts to change, I knew the time was coming.
I loathe the idea of using a chair, but there are times when it feels like we could do so much more if we had one. Sounds kind of weird to me, but it's true. Imagine being able to go farther or to different places because we weren't held back by me? I would have thought life would be more restrictive with a chair, but I'm starting to see the possibilities. I also like the thought of not having a heart attack during an ice storm ... just have to make sure my husband doesn't fall pushing me! Don't want to have to get his and hers chairs.
I know this might sound weird to the rest of you, but I didn't know "how" you got a wheelchair. I didn't know the logistics, but I also didn't and still don't know how to "do it". Do you just go get one? Do you tell people you're getting one? Do you just show up with one? It's a very emotional and private thing for me. I'm embarrassed and afraid of what it will mean.
So .... I talked to an OT from my area and she helped me get the ball rolling. She gave me the name of a few places just so I could go and check out the goods. I got a few quotes and together we filled out an application for Muscular Dystrophy of Canada. Checking out chairs was like slowly pulling off a bandaid for me. The first time we went, it was just my husband and I. I couldn't sit in it. I didn't want to. I did like a hot little red number I saw, but I wasn't ready to picture myself in it. Leaving the store, I knew I was either going to start laughing or burst into tears. I opted for turning up the radio and singing really loudly. The counsellor I have been seeing said that small steps are often the way they get people to over come their fears. Yeah ... first step done.
The second trip was more fun. My husband and I brought our oldest daughter and my niece. What isn't more fun with curious little girls eh? They inspected all the chairs and encourage me to get the plus sized chair so we could all sit in it together. I'm sure my husband would love pushing the three of us around. My daughter was a little confused by it all and seemed upset. I let her ask questions and I think she understands it now. It will be so fun to see what my youngest thinks of it. She'll totally think it's a new toy for her.
So, we decided on the little red number and hope to have everything done in time for the snow and ice. I'm learning that it's not there to be used all the time or take anything away from me. It's going to help me when I need it and make my life more rewarding. I still haven't really told anyone in my life about it. I don't really know how to. It's not common conversation ... "hey, so I got a wheelchair". I also don't want to show up places with it and have people starring at me or asking the same question over and over like when I started using a cane. I guess we just field it as it comes.
So, now to come up with a name for my little, red transport chair .. ???
